Contemporary Opening Sentences
The first sentence of your work should grab the agent's, editor's, or reader's attention as well as the one-sentence pitch for your work does.
If you don't understand the concept of "urgency," or "hook," or "attention-grabbing," read Alexandria Constantinova (formerly writing as "Sherri") Szeman's article from The Writer (reprinted in The Writer's Handbook 1997 and in The Novel Writer's Handbook) about how to get urgency into your work: "Urgency: Good Writing Needs It." By the way, urgency applies as much to non-fiction, screenplays, scripts, and poetry as it does to fiction.
Here are some examples of attention-grabbing first sentences from contemporary, published novels.
- They shoot the white girl first. (Toni Morrison, Paradise)
- When I was little I would think of ways to kill my daddy. (Kaye Gibbons, Ellen Foster)
- Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. (J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone)
- Then I saw her. (Alexandria Constantinova Szeman, formerly writing as "Sherri", The Kommandant's Mistress)
- "No one ever said fighting terrorism was easy," Falcon Spitzer whispered to herself as she ducked into a recessed doorway to catch her breath. (CJ Cooper, Stab of Intelligence)
- For all I know, you're just getting into the habit of reading excellent literature books, so you haven't heard of me yet. (Alan Balter, Holden & Me)
- Throughout the long summer before my mother's trial began, and then during those crisp days in the fall when her life was paraded publicly before the county -- her character lynched, her wisdom impugned -- I overheard much more than my parents realized, and I understood more than they would have liked. (Chris Bohjalian, Midwives)
- Rat was like every forty-one-year-old fuck walking around. (Kevin Lavey, Rat)
- They got there sooner than I expected. (Alexandria Constantinova Szeman, formerly writing as "Sherri", Only With the Heart)
- Dave Razkowski fell from the rock-face he'd been climbing, and the world slowed down. (Brenda Barrie, The Binding)
- Lightning struck the Maryland hilltop, igniting a blaze. (Newton Love, How the Strong Survive)
- I'd never given much thought to how I would die -- though I'd had reason enough in the last few months -- but even if I had, I would not have imagined it like this. (Stephanie Meyer, Twilight)
- First of all, let me get something straight: This is a JOURNAL, not a diary. (Jeff Kinney, Diary of a Wimpy Kid)
- I'd been waiting for the vampire for years when he walked into the bar. (Charlaine Harris, Dead Until Dark: Sookie Stackhouse/Southern Vampire Series #1)
Again, your first sentence doesn't necessarily have to be extremely short, although it shouldn't be hundreds of words long either. You can use semi-colons and subordinating conjunctions to help you out with your opening sentence, but it still has to be one sentence that's intriguing and attention-grabbing. It must have urgency.
Evaluate your opening sentence. If you read only that sentence, would you want to continue reading? Be honest with yourself. Otherwise, you'll never succeed in the writing world.Ask your friends to read it. Ask strangers in the library and in bookstores to read it: ask them if they'd like to continue reading the book.
If they say "yes," but they're half-hearted about it, you need to work on the first sentence. If they say "yes" with obvious enthusiasm, you are definitely on the right track.
If they ask where they can buy your book, prepare your query and contact RockWay immediately.
in all Genres; Revised & Expanded, 10th Anniversary Edition
© 2001, 2011, 2012 by Alexandria Constantinova Szeman
(formerly writing as "Sherri")
RockWay Press, LLC Logo © 2004, 2012 by Alexandria Constantinova Szeman.
Wet-plate Collodian Photograph of Cathedral Rock © 2004 by Robert J. Szabo. Used with artist's gracious permission.
Web-site Updated: Tuesday 1 May 2012
